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What not to say about mixed race relationships

Inspired by this (The comments thread rather then the article itself) .

1) You’ll have such beautiful children.

“But that’s a nice thing to say!”. Yes but it’s also a tired old stereotype. Plus, nothing magic happens when mixed race people procreate, i.e two less than averagely good looking people will probably have a less than averagely good looking child.

2) Any cooking metaphors/ animal husbandry metaphors

Mix..blend…yuck, yuck, yuck. Remember you’re talking about human beings, not food. People can’t actually mix or blend. Also, people in mixed race relationships (MRR) have children for exactly the same reasons other people do, not as some kind of eugenics project. When people say “Oh x ethnicity with y ethnicity, that’s a really good mix”, is that meant to be taken seriously? Is there such a thing as a bad ethnic mix? Are they expecting people in MRR’s to be grateful for their approval?

3)Whether you approve of them or not

Yes, everyone’s entitled to their opinion but consider the wisdom of sharing that opinion, and whether the person you’re talking to wants that opinion. If the reason you don’t approve is “It’s not fair on the children”, then the 1960’s are calling and they want their prejudice back.

4) Speculate as to why they are having a Mixed Race relationship.

Unless you are dating that person, then it’s really none of your business. Even if you think it’s just a big fetish, so what? Are you the love police, ready to bust up any relationship that doesn’t fit your criteria?

Again, people in MRR’s, are probably with each other for the same reasons as any other relationship – because they like each other and being together.

5)Any stereotypes (positive or negative) or your general opinion of their partner’s ethinic group.

Aside from having heard all the stereotypes already, do you think the person you are talking to will say “Oh you’re right, all “n” men are domineering/romantic/generous/mean (delete as appropriate). I should leave him/stay with him forever.”?

Anyone got anymore to add?

Yes He Did

Obama won by a landslide! This is a good thing for America and for the world.

As I hear about the massive turnout, the waiting for hours to vote, my mind moves to places where people do not enjoy that right. No choices, no debates, no hope of any difference.

They deserve better and insha Allah, I hope I live to see that happen.

Please and Thank You

So tomorrow is the big day and I wish I didn’t have to care so much about it. Sure, it sucked when the French elected Sarkozy (and by such a narrow margin too), but that was more worry about the lives of my Muslim siblings in France, rather then a feeling of sadness for the whole world. After Bush’s re-election I can remember The independent front page which just read “Four More Years”, with pictures of the various atrocities that had taken place while he had been in power.

A victory for Obama would be something very special. You Tube comments are usually a pit of inanity, but recently I watched the video for “A Change is Gonna Come” by Sam Cooke and all the recent comments were talking about Obama and how he was the change they wanted.

So to any Americans reading this, please vote for Obama tomorrow.

On the other side of the Americas, another man of mixed race* secured his place in history. Lewis Hamilton’s victory in the Formula One championship was the stuff of fairy tales but also the result of years of hard work and a father who made many sacrifices to help his son achieve his dream.

The thank you part of the post is my little Alhamdulilah list of big and little things I’m happy about.

1)The Bump! Yay, I’m finally getting a proper bump! Sometimes I forget I then I look in the mirror and see myself with a big bump. Alhamdulilah. It makes up for the fact that I can only wear Crocs as my feet are too huge for normal shoes.

2)Autumn. Love it. Feeling the seasons change is such a blessing here. I love the falling leaves, darker nights and the way the sky smells different.

3)The shop across the road, it’s open twelve hours a day, has a Post Office inside it and sells everything from kitchen utensils to Ben and Jerrys (I find having a supply of Ben Jerrys in such close proximity very comforting, ditto the halal Subways up the road).

4)Winter Prayer times. There’s something really nice about having the prayers in so close together. It really focuses you. Also, not having to get up too early for Fajr is very good.

5)My Before I Have The Baby Book Pile. The Peter Taylor Troubles Trilogy (try saying that fast), the Five Lives of man, Gardens of the Righteous, The Years of Rice and Salt… I’m to get something by Isabel Allende too. Any other recommendations please share. Also if there is such a thing as a non-sanctimonious, helpful baby book.

6)Ebay. A Bargain Hunter’s paradise. I’m not ashamed to say, I’ve got some great baby things from there.

7)Mr Outlines (saving the best til last, masha Allah’s please) because he’s lovely and is as pleased with my bump as I am.

Anyway, for all the pregnant and previously pregnant ladies out there, here’s some glam rock to shake your bump to:

*I think Lewis Hamilton does identify as mixed race, which is more common as a racial descriptor in the U.K, then in the U.S. Obama I’ve heard identified and I think indentifing, as both mixed race and black. I’m happy to discuss this point and change my wording if necessary.